Change for the better: Part 6
Long overdue but here I am once again, with a little recap on my challenge to #changeforthebetter, aka to overcome my fear of failure.
What I have noticed throughout this process is that I am terrific at making excuses for myself: I don't have the right equipment (thanks to Special K, now I do!), I have to do the dishes (leave'em! it's not like I'm going to do them anyway!), my desk is a mess (then clean it!) etc etc etc... If I was half as good at getting shit done, I'd be a a full-time illustrator by now.
That nagging little voice in my head is still there, but it's become a lot easier to talk back to it considering the joy I get from completing a drawing. The therapy sessions I had made me realise I was being way too hard on myself. What's so bad about failing anyway? What is the worst that could happen if I try to draw Lala and end up failing miserably? I mean, it's not like Lala is suddenly going to start looking like her penciled counterpart, right. RIGHT?
But the biggest change was definitely my loving and ultra-supportive boyfriend. He'll literally be cheering me on when I'm working on something and he truly is my biggest fan (and I'm his because he's a rock star durh).
Don't have a boyfriend? Acknowledge the importance of feedback, and take note of what people are saying. Before I met James I just brushed off the compliments I got about my drawing, my photography or my writing, but then he came along, forced me to look at him in the eyes and believe what he was saying. I had to learn to accept and appreciate compliments, and my confidence skyrocketed.
For now, I think I have found my niche, I know what I like to draw and I have developed my own modus operandi and will continue to draw cute animals with funky headgear for a little bit before I move on to bigger and greater things.
My goals for the coming weeks/months include setting up some sort of portfolio, make room in my closet for James' stuff*, take outfit pictures (we have yet to find a moment in which I feel like getting out of my jammies, dammit!), stay creative and live the best life possible.
I have very much enjoyed this challenge and I can definitely say it made me grow as a person. So thank you Special K for this opportunity, thank you to my therapist who pushed me through a dark time and thank you James for being your amazing self. I take my party hat off to you.
Next up? I've been fiddling with the blog a little bit and will be doing a relaunch... Someday... Hopefully soon... But yeah you never know. Keep in touch on Instagram for shoddy mirror outfit pictures and snaps of Lala being adorble!
*On that note: Check out my Tictail because I'm selling things! I'll gradually add more as I go but check it out, and be sure to e-mail me for a better deal on shipping at discometooblivion at gmail dot com! Yeah!
Labels: change for the better